Financial Domination Support Group
Hi Guys, welcome to my journal.
I’m an ex money slave, who had a severe addiction to financial domination. I created this site to help other guys learn how to overcome their addiction, and to warn anyone interested in 'trying out' this extremely dangerous fetish of the dangers it holds. Now, I know this journal is quite controversial, and will likely attract some negative attention from both financial dommes, and financial slaves who are so deeply entrenched in their addiction they are beyond help. If this is you, please, click the back button on your browser. This site isn’t for you - it’s for financial slaves who are struggling to get over their addiction and who really want to change, and start living and enjoying their lives without the burden of financial slavery holding them back.
Financial slavery is quite complex, and unfortunately is a very rare and undocumented addiction, so there is very little support and advice available. I’m no psychologist, but I aim to provide some pointers here to help guys get back on track and start living their life for themselves, without sacrificing it for their Dommes. The advice I provide here is just that - advice. Everything I mention here has been tried and tested by myself, but please understand that any actions you take from reading this site are your responsibility.
The Dangers of Financial domination
dangers and consequences of financial domination are not just
financial, they include many other areas including social,
interpersonal and your own health and wellbeing:
this against the benefits - a mindblowing orgasm and believing you have
pleased a woman (who probably doesn't appreciate your effort), and you
can see that financial domination really is not worth pursuing or
Psychology of Financial SlaveryThe vast power of financial domination stems from the way it's deeply wired into ones sex drive and emotions. The fundamental root of the pleasure obtained from submitting to a woman financially resides in the value system. The value system rewards us with pleasure each time one of our values is fulfilled. The value system is designed to prolong and enhance life, but the value system assumes all values are positive and life enhancing. If somehow, intentionally or accidentally, we acquire a negative value (such as the value of submitting financially to a woman), then whenever we fulfill this value, we are rewarded with pleasure. The value system cannot differentiate between a positive value that is meant to enhance our life, and a negative value that restricts our life, so whenever a negative value like submitting financially is triggered, we are rewarded with pleasure as though it were a positive, life enhancing value. This explains why financial domination is so addictive and pleasurable, and why it is so challenging to overcome.
A slaves belief system also holds a big key to the addiction. Whatever one believes about themselves and their world is true to them. When I was a slave I believed that I was worthless, pathetic, a loser, and that women were superior to myself and all men on earth! These beliefs are not the ones someone with genuinely high levels of self-esteem would possess.
These beliefs developed from my inaccurate perception of the world (chiefly how I perceived rejections from women in my early youth), low self-esteem, BDSM and D/s porn (this was a VERY big influencer for me), and from the feminist programming from the media and the world in general.
When one realizes that one is NOT worthless, that one has tremendous value both to the world and to a woman one can have a loving relationship with, ones self esteem is raised and his desire to submit decreases. This brings me to my nerdy formula! The degree of ones 'submissiveness' is inversely proportional to ones level of self-esteem:
sorry... I couldn't help it! I'm a scientist at heart, in all this text there had to be an equation somewhere! lol
In addition to exploiting this negative value and the negative beliefs many slaves possess, many financial dommes employ hypnosis and NLP to anchor your feelings of arousal and orgasm to sending them cash! They also exploit human behaviors, such as social proof, commitment and consistency, the friendship factor/liking and scarcity to add further punches to their already deadly anchors. These methods of persuasion can be seen on pretty much all financial domme websites, in their Livejournal entries as well in some of their videos. Almost everything you get from a financial domme is in some way designed to keep you addicted. Financial dommes are very intelligent, manipulative and sneaky individuals and produce highly elaborate schemes to anchor emotions and trigger them strategically so you'll spend more on them and stick with them for longer.
When a slave buys gifts or tributes his Domme, he feels a sense of importance and self-worth, that he has pleased and helped his Domme. This is another aspect of the addiction, where one can easily become addicted to feeling good about buying gifts for his Domme. The slave also gains psychological trust, and acquires 'pay momentum' where he is more likely to submit further in the future to prove to himself and the domme that he is consistent.
Thoughts and habits in the mind are like paths in grass. The more one thinks about or acts on a thought, the deeper and more worn the path becomes. Therefore the more one exposes ones self to financial domination (or any form of submissive D/s - including porn), the more his subconscious mind is programmed and influenced to be submissive. The more his mind is programmed, the harder it is to overcome the addiction.
A surefire indication that you have been influenced by the contents of the subconscious mind is if you dream about being dominated - either consciously day dreaming, or subconsciously when you sleep.
Read Influence by Dr Robert Cialdini for more information about the various influence and persuasion tactics dommes may use, it's a very insightful book!
Also, Frogs Into Princes by Bandler & Grinder, and Introducing NLP by O'Connor and Seymour are two books which offer vast quantities of information about NLP and anchoring. Frogs Into Princes is the original book on NLP by the founders of NLP, Richard Bandler and John Grinder. It is currently out of print, but there are copies available on Amazon and eBay, but expect to pay highly for them - my copy was $80 (and it says $7.50 on the back!) - it's a good book though, and worth every penny.
The Psychology of Self-Esteem by Dr. Nathaniel Branden covers the value system in detail, and also covers many other aspects of self-esteem. It's a must read book if you are serious about overcoming this addiction!
The Mechanism of Mind by Edward DeBono covers the way in which memories and habits form in the mind (the grass track analogy). It's quite technical, but a very interesting read.
Types of financial slaveI believe there are 4 types of financial slaves:
1) The 'fantasizing slave' - This guy browses all the toplists and livejournal pages for financial dommes, and fantasizes about being enslaved and dominated by them. He lurks, but doesn't act on his desires.
2) The media fantasist - This guy acts on his desires by buying media, such as pictures or videos from the financial domme. By doing so, he is gaining psychological trust with the domme, and gaining 'commitment and consistency' which increases the probability of further future submission dramatically. This seemingly small initial purchase may snowball into mass buying of all the dommes videos and pictures, which can amount to several hundred dollars. This is the start of the 'real' addiction.
3) The 'Junior' Financial Slave - This guy contacts the domme, either in response to one of the requests in one of the dommes videos (e.g. 'email me for further instruction', 'email me for permission to cum', 'spoil me', etc), or just from her website. He buys gifts from her wishlist, sends giftcards, or tributes her on niteflirt. At first these tributes are relatively small, but as the addiction grows, he starts spending more and more on his Domme. He may also try to compete with other guys to be her 'favorite pet'.
4) The 'Mature' Financial Slave - This is a guy who has served his Domme for extended periods of time. He likely has a good relationship with his Domme, and gives her 80+% of his disposable income. I have never been here myself, so my advice for overcoming this type of problem would just be theory and hypothesis from some of the books I have read on addictions and psychology. This guy is likely to be deeply in debt and suffering severe consequences for his actions. If anyone has overcome this, which I am sure there will be, please contact me and let me know how you succeeded. I also have a forum up for guys to post to where they can share their experiences.
Overcoming the addictionIn brief, I believe the following ideas are essential to overcome this addiction:
1) Acknowledge the problem and accept 100% responsibility for it
2) Make a decision to overcome the addiction
3) Get Pissed Off!!!
4) Set Goals
5) Increase your self-esteem
6) Create 'conventional' sex habits
7) Learn seduction and find your ideal woman
Acknowledge the problem and accept 100% responsibilityIt’s so important that you realize how serious this addiction is. If you are currently a slave you’ll know exactly what the problems are. If you’re a 'fantasizing slave' STOP NOW!!! You will eventually be lured in, it’s only a matter of time. I lurked for almost 2 years before I finally gave in and paid, and paid dearly I did. This is no joke it’s a serious addiction that can truly fuck up your life!
It can be easy to blame your Domme, but really all the blame rests on yourself. It is essential to accept 100% responsibility for your actions. The dommes INFLUENCED you to act, they didn't FORCE you to act. They employ mind persuasion, not mind control.
The sooner you accept 100% responsibility for your actions, the sooner you can free yourself from this addiction.
Make a decision to overcome the addictionNow you have acknowledge 100% responsibility, it's important to take this to the next step. Now its time to take responsibility for OVERCOMING the addiction. Make a decision to overcome the addiction! Once the decision has been made, it has been made and there is no going back. Write the decision down on paper to make it more 'real' and lock it deeper into your subconscious. Totally detach from the option of going back.
Get pissed off!!!!!Emotions are VERY powerful things. All emotions can be used as motivation. The financial dommes use your emotions of orgasm, sex drive and feelings of importance to motivate you to tribute them.
I think the quickest approach to overcoming financial domination is to get pissed off!!! Really get mad! Get so mad your anger exceeds your desire to submit, so mad you don’t want to give her any more of your money. Whenever you think of your Goddess, don’t run thoughts of giving her all your weeks wage, think THE FUCKING BITCH HOW DARE SHE ARRRRGH!!! Get REALLY MAD! Eventually, this anger will be anchored onto your thoughts you have of your Goddess, and these thoughts will overwrite your thoughts of surrendering financially to her. This was the most powerful exercise that helped me. It’s simple but effective.
Now, a word of warning. Do not let your anger gain control of you. Just use it as fuel to motivate you to overcome your addiction. Don't blame your domme or yourself too much, just get angry when you think about your domme or submitting to her, but don't get so mad you have an aneurysm!
Anger is a very powerful emotion and you will find that it will overwrite your desire to submit, so when your feeling anger, when you are pissed off, there is no way you can think of surrendering to your domme! But remember the old spider man line: ‘With great power comes great responsibility’ – use your anger in constructive ways to overcome your addiction, not in negative destructive or harmful ways.
This stage will effectively 'overwrite' any anchors you have in your mind to submitting to your domme, and will also give you motivation to overcome your addiction, but it won't solve the core, fundamental root of the addiction - the negative value of financial domination in the value system. This means, although you won't feel the desire to submit to your specific domme, you may still find the thought of submitting to 'a domme' arousing. If you persist, you can get to a manageable level where you no longer want to submit to any domme whatsoever. This is the level where I am right now :). All it takes is persistence for a few weeks, and you can be here too.
Set GoalsI think it’s very important to set goals for things YOU want to achieve in YOUR life! Do you know how long the average person lives? The figure may shock you. The average person only lives around 28251 days!!! That’s not a long time!! Do you want to look back on your life and see yourself not really accomplishing anything (apart from getting in a shitload of debt)?
One of the best visualization exercises I know that can give you a big kick up the ass to make yourself change is to imagine yourself 80 years old or so, sitting in the retirement home on the last day of your life, looking back on your life knowing that your time is done, and nothing else can be done. You think about all the times you could have changed, all the things you could have done, all the great things in the world you could have experienced, but didn't.
Do you really want to be the guy who regrets his life? I know I don't!
If you do this visualization properly you'll feel down and depressed - and even more motivated than ever to overcome this addiction.
Setting goals is easy, but there is a structure to them though.
There are 4 main requirements of a goal:
1) The goal must be PERSONAL
2) The goal must be POSITIVE!
3) The goal must be MEASURABLE
4) The goal must be SPECIFIC
The questions below provide a good outline for your goals.
By answering the questions below for yourself, in detail, you should feel a sense of motivation to overcome your addiction and start living your life for YOU, not for your domme. ANYTHING is possible, if you want to be a millionaire, put it down as a goal. I know I want to be a millionaire before I turn 40. That’s one of my goals. Remember goals must be personal, positive, measurable and specific. E.g.:
I will earn $1Million per annum before the age of 40
So now it’s your turn…
How much do you want to earn in 5 years time?
How much do you want to earn in 10 years time?
How much do you want to earn in 20 years time?
How much savings do you want?
How much do you want to retire with?
Where do you want to live?
What car do you want to drive?
What would your ideal girlfriend or wife look like?
Where would you like to travel to in the world?
It is always a good idea to write out your goals on paper. This makes your goal a goal, not just a wish. Some people even suggest writing them in a spiral notebook and rewriting them every morning.
Get yourself a copy of Brian Tracy's The Psychology of Achievement for more information about goal setting. It's a very insightful audio program. You can get yourself a copy from www.briantracy.com.
Increase your self-esteemFrom my studies into psychology, I believe that the root to financial domination and many other problems is low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem, or a low self-concept that pertains to women, are far more likely to submit to a ‘Goddess’ they perceive to be superior to them. They degrade and humiliate themselves for the entertainment of their Goddess, just to suffer themselves. They may get excited sexually, but subconsciously they are reinforcing their negative self-esteem each time they submit and humiliate themselves and act in ways that individuals with low self-esteem act. On the flip side, people with high self-esteem don’t give their hard earned cash over to some beautiful woman online, they don’t beg for permission to cum, they don’t eat their cum after their Goddess has given them the privilege to cum. People with high self-esteem would think that is CRAZY!
So, how do we improve our self-esteem?
Dr Nathaniel Branden in his book ‘How to raise your self-esteem’ talks about the importance of living consciously. I truly believe this is extremely important when it comes to overcoming financial domination addictions. Living consciously basically means seeing the world as it is, whether you like it or not, free from any perceptions or 'delusions' you have. See the world LOGICALLY rather than emotionally! When you get horny and your mind goes all fuzzy and euphoric just as your about to send your Goddess $600, your living unconsciously and emotionally! You're living a fantasy that is detached from and avoiding reality. Whenever you get into this state STEP BACK AND STOP!!!!! See it logically AS IT IS!!! She's a woman, you’re a guy, your handing over a shitload of cash – but why? Because she’s a Goddess? Lmfao that woman goes for a shit in the morning just like you, she’s nothing particularly special, just a woman! She's no Goddess, she’s just an attractive woman out to make a quick killing! That’s reality! It's harsh, but true.
Another important aspect of raising self-esteem is to ACT as though you already have high self-esteem. Self-esteem is like a vicious circle. If you have low self-esteem, you act in ways that low self esteem people act (e.g. believing your only worth to a woman is the money you give her, drinking cum because your 'goddess' says so, etc). This further reinforces your low self-esteem. People with high self esteem would never dream of doing such a thing! Act like someone with high self-esteem, and eventually you'll start thinking like them, and your addiction to financial slavery will be a thing of the past!
Create 'conventional' sex habits
Now, as I described earlier, financial domination is brought about by
constantly thinking and associating the feeling of orgasm to sending
dommes money. The more this association is triggered, the deeper
it becomes and the harder it is to break free.